** An edited version of this piece was featured on Thought Catalog under the title, Netflix’s ‘Someone Great’ Delivered The Best Piece Of Breakup Advice You’ll Ever Read
I’ll admit it– I’m a SUCKER for a cheesy romcom.
So when Netflix suggested I watch Someone Great starring Gina Rodriguez (as Jenny), you KNOW I clicked. And watched. And laughed. And cried.
But it’s one scene in particular that GOT ME.
Jenny sits on the F train with tears streaming down her face as she pens a letter to her ex.
A person she was with for nine years– most of those years spent in her twenties.
And, as a person who has penned many a tear-soaked letter and journal entry, it hit me in the feeeeeels.
So, naturally, I decided to transcribe all 226 of her spoken words into a kind of p o e m.
Because maybe you don’t like watching romcoms, but you need to hear this too.
Do you think I can have one more kiss?
I’ll find closure on your lips and then I’ll go.
Maybe, also, one more breakfast, one more lunch, and one more dinner.
I’ll be full and happy and we can part.
But, in between meals, maybe we can lie in bed one more time?
One more prolonged moment where time suspends indefinitely as I rest my head on your chest.
MY hope is if we add up the one more’s, they will equal a lifetime.
And I’ll never have to get to the part where I let you go.
But that’s not real, is it?
There are no more ‘one mores.’
I met you when everything was new and exciting,
and the possibilities of the world seemed
And they still are.
But not for us.
Somewhere between then and now, here and there–
I guess we didn’t just grow apart…
…we grew UP.
When something b r e a k s,
if the pieces are large enough,
you can fix it.
Unfortunately, sometimes things don’t break.
But when you let the light in, shattered glass will glitter.
And in those moments – when the pieces of what we were catch the sun – I’ll remember just how beautiful it was.
Just how beautiful it will always be.
Because it was us.
And we were magic.
Oof. Breaking up is hard to do.
But what I love about this cheesy movie is that the happy ending wasn’t found in the reconciliation of a relationship. Nor was it found with the beginning of a new romance.
It wasn’t, ‘Oh, I don’t need him, I’ve got [insert newer, handsomer guy]!’
It was THIS!
Jenny’s heart-wrenching, tear-soaked letter that reassures all of us that even shattered glass can bring LIGHT.
Glittering, shimmering, shiny light that makes YOU feel happy and joyful and alive.
I’ve been working through my very first break-up for the past year now and it’s been a rollercoaster. But I’m finally at this shimmery, glittery phase.
And the funny thing? I actually wrote my ex a letter about a month ago to let him know that. Like, I can finally look back at our relationship with happy, fond memories. I can think about it without feeling angry or upset. I can smile as I think about the good ol’ times.
And, at first, that confused me.
If the times had together were so happy, why did it end?
I guess I wanted the ‘one mores’, as Jenny put it.
One more this, one more that–
I’ll get it out of my system and THEN I’ll feel better.
I can move on.
But I’ve finally learned why certain happy times lay in the past.
And they don’t need to be dug up in the present.
Because constantly digging up the past leaves a lot of messy dirt, strewn about. It’s only when we rest that we’re able to see growth. The flowers are finally blossoming and, my, they’re lovely.
You see, there lies a relationship that was good and great but wasn’t meant for always.
And may it rest in peace.
Someone Great reminded me that finding someone great shouldn’t be my objective.
I am someone great.
And so are you.
Spread kindness and cheer, xo